🎓 Before You Get Tired of School… Get a First Degree!
Before you start saying “school is a scam,” make sure you have at least a first degree. And for those wondering what that means—it refers to your B.Sc. (Bachelor of Science), B.A. (Bachelor of Arts), B.Eng. (Bachelor of Engineering), and other similar qualifications. Feel free to drop the ones you know in the comment section!
Whoever told you going to school is a scam—my brother, avoid them.
Now, have you ever wondered what really goes on within the four walls of a higher institution? A lot of cool and goofy stuff happens there. But today, I’ll focus on a part of my university life that keeps coming back to me—because I still live with the lessons today.
In fact, I was once queried in two different companies for one of these "acts," even though I was innocent. One gave me a warning, the other terminated my appointment because I wasn’t “remorseful.” But how can I agree to what was never my intention? I'd rather burn than confess that Satan is Lord.
These are true stories. And Pellar, if you keep dancing on TikTok without getting a first degree, you’ll never understand this life.
🚐 The LASU Commute Chronicles
Among my siblings, I was never allowed to live on campus. My dad preferred I stay at home—so I commuted from Isolo to Lagos State University (LASU), Ojo every weekday. Or, well… Monday to Wednesday. 😎
Thursday and Friday? I’d collect my transport fare, dress up like I was going to school, then hang out somewhere cool, get tipsy, return home tired, and act like I had a full day of lectures.
Ask anyone—LASU on Thursdays and Fridays (between 2004–2008) was not the place to be. You can verify that in the comments.
Because of my “vanishing act,” I didn’t write many Continuous Assessments (CAs), meaning I lost out on 30 marks per course—every semester. Yet somehow, I still graduated. Hehehehe… 😂
📚 What’s AOC Again?
Do you know what AOC (Area of Concentration) means during exams?
Well, I didn’t. From 100 Level through to 300 Level, I had no idea what AOC was. I used to walk into exams blind—while others were solving questions from lecturers’ highlighted topics.
Studying Mathematics with that level of ignorance? A madness.
Coming from a school like Baptist Boys’ High School, Oke-Saje Abeokuta (Omolope ’02 set) where I was study prefect, my GPA was no longer giving “genius.”
One day, a departmental scholar (now a lecturer at LASU’s Department of Mathematics) called me aside. He looked drained—one of those guys always buried in formulas. And he said:
“Please don’t be offended… Are you a member of this department or just the faculty?”
I was shocked. I smiled and asked, “Which department?”
He said, “Mathematics.”
I said, “Oh yes!” proudly. 😂
Then he said something I’ll never forget:
“It’s not too late. Go buy another JAMB form and apply for something else—Fisheries, Botany, Zoology. I’ve never seen you in class. You won’t graduate from this department.”
But guess what? He lied.
I graduated. 🤣🤣🤣
🏨 Enter My GF (Godfather)
So who could I stay with during exams? 💡
Boom! My GF (Godfather) came to mind.
He loved Odekun and Cow Tail Pepper Soup (very hot and spicy). I knew the spot! 😂
He agreed to let me squat with him during exam periods—and that was when I finally understood what AOC meant. Everything changed from there.
But one day, something happened…
🕵🏽♂️ Suspicion at Manchester Villa
My GF stayed at Manchester Villa, home to hardcore Manchester United fans. I, an unapologetic Arsenal fan, stayed as a guest. His girlfriend was stunning—a petite French student with a sweet voice and model looks. But her beauty wasn’t the problem.
Unbeknownst to me, there was a silent investigation brewing:
Allegedly, I was trying to woo his girlfriend. 😳
One day, I arrived at his place. He was out of town. I called to let him know I was around for exams. For the first time ever, he asked:
“Why didn’t you call before coming?”
Bros, I don show be say I don show. 😅
Even his girlfriend acted differently.
She offered I stay in one room while she stayed in the other. Ehn? Say what? Full temptation. 🚩
I quickly remembered my coursemate, nicknamed Chelsea, lived nearby. So I left my bags and went over to his place instead.
We spent the night sharing materials, doing a mini quiz, and had a solid revision.
🍲 Truth in a Bowl of Pepper Soup
The next day, I returned to Manchester Villa. My GF saw me and immediately asked:
“Where did you sleep?”
No greetings. No “How far?” Just suspicion.
I knew it was time to clear the air. So I took him out that night—to our favorite pepper soup spot.
As he sipped and relaxed, he said:
“If you slept in that house last night, no matter what you say today, I wouldn’t have believed you.”
Why? Because he received a report:
That I was always calling and texting his girlfriend. 😱
But I didn’t even have her number. I didn’t know if she was using MTN, Glo, Etisalat, or Airtel.
Then he played an audio recording—someone impersonating my voice. But I quickly pointed out: “I never call you by your first name. Whoever did this just mimicked my deep voice.”
After some analysis and bro-code bonding, I cleared my name.
Crisis averted. Friendship saved.
💡 Lessons from Campus Life
- Never save your friend’s partner’s number, unless it’s strictly for business.
- Don’t stay under the same roof with your friend’s partner in his absence. No matter how harmless it seems, you’ll explain tire.
- Trust your instincts—they hardly fail you.
- Respect the vibes, but respect boundaries more.
🎉 Happy Birthday GF 🌹
This story was inspired by my GF—whose birthday was yesterday, July 19th. I almost forgot until Facebook reminded me (thanks, Mark Zuckerberg 😅).
Feel free to share what you learned from this story in the comment section.
#UniversityChronicles
#LifeLessons
#RealTalk
School is not a scam.
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